Besides the surprise snowfall last night, today started off relatively normal. I say relatively because I had dreams about Tsunami’s and my mom kicking me out of the house. They were both equally disturbing and I welcomed the alarm clock when it beeped at me. The only thing exciting on the schedule was my wedding dress fitting scheduled for 10 am. But I seem to be able to make everything an adventure….
I left a little bit early because I had never been to the seamstress’ house before, the roads looked a bit messy, and my car was covered in snow. I spent twenty minutes clearing off my car only to have my fingers go numb and then need an outfit change as I was covered in cold, wet snow quickly cleaned off my car. Not to be discouraged, I sped away with my mapquested directions. Enter ADHD and distraction~ first I miss my exit. Not a huge deal. After a couple ‘damnits!’ I reminded myself I had given myself extra time and to relax. I find the seamstress’ house with 15 minutes to spare, and feeling relaxed, I decide to drive around this beautiful neighborhood to pass the time. I hummed as I passed old brick farmhouses next to huge brick mansions and sweet little blue shutters on houses with white siding. I better keep an eye on the time, I remind myself, glancing at the clock. 9:55, time to head back towards her house. I turn around and head in the direction I came only to realize I have no idea what streets I had turned on and how far I had gone. No big deal, I reason. I still have 5 minutes and this neighborhood is not that big. I’m sure I will run into her street soon. I continue driving, trying each different road, seeing if it will lead me back to her house. I turn left and I turn right. I make u-turns. I start to sweat. 10:05. I’m sure I’ll stumble back to her house in a minute, no need to panic. 10:10… the residents in the neighborhood are giving me strange looks and wondering who the creeper in the silver saturn is and why she has driven past their house 5 times. Humiliated, I decided to call the seamstress and let her know I got a little turned around, I’m sorry to be later and could she please send me in the right direction. No answer. I call again and leave a message. I stumble through an apology and an embarrassed explanation of my situation. 10:20 finds me still driving around. Feeling defeated and overwhelmingly stupid, hot tears slip down my cheeks as I look in the glove compartment for a map. I'm not ashamed to say I grew up in the days when mapquest took off and it has pretty much been my BFF since then. My map skills are sub par. Knowing reading a map was going to take nothing short of a miracle, I invoked the Holy Spirit, and was pleased when I found the street I was currently pulled over on. Feeling a bit more confident, I look to find my cross street or the seamstress’ street. I strain my eyes but it is to no avail. I could not read the names of the side streets. I could barely make out the letters. Why are these streets written in –.006 font size?! At a loss, I swallow my pride and call Marcus. I’m really lost, my voice breaks as I explain my situation. He quickly hops on the computer and sets me straight. It literally takes me 3 seconds to reach my destination. Oh, the humility. Not only had I snapped at Marcus earlier that morning on the phone {I’m blaming it on PMS}, but I had to come crawling back to him a bit later only to inform him of my completely idiotic predicament and beg for his assistance. But he makes no mention of my intelligence level, and assures me that he too would have gotten lost easily {I love him when he lies to me like this-this man has an impeccable sense of direction and seems to know most cities and neighborhoods like the back of his hand}. The seamstress meets me at the door and apologizes for missing my phone call. I assure her it is no big deal and tell her I am sorry for being late. As I explain to her what happened, I could see a hint of a smile on her lips. And who could blame her?! By the time I got home and recounted the story to my mom, we were both laughing. This morning was so typical me. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve called my mother, desperate and unfashionably tardy to one event or another, for directions help after map quest steers me wrong.
In any event, I thought this morning’s fiasco would only be redeemable if I shared if for others to laugh at {and hopefully confide in me that you’ve done the same thing too}. I would write more, but I’m off to go learn how to read a map. Goodnight friends :)
No comments:
Post a Comment